Now we all know my dear friend Jusky is one hard brunching motherfucker. Emppalp can wear a tie and three days of scruff like no one’s business. Trolleycat likes her 9 AM beers and NO ONE ON THE INTERNETS LOVES BACON LIKE KRIS.
This is the A-Fucking-Team of Brunch right there people.
However, when comparing them to the Twin Cities wings, burgers and beers group, only one word comes to mind for the DC Crew: Mediocrity.
Yes, I said it. DC is a great team of rookies, but to use a baseball metaphor, the Minneapolis/Saint Paul tweet-up people are the Teddy Fucking Ballgame of drinking and eating.
Wwwesty, Geturowncoffee, and I have been drinking since Jusky was still teething (Adam is done teething, right?) AND I’m pretty sure that Wwwesty actually shoots the cow that goes on his burger.
Has Kris has ever shot a bartender to get her mimosa?
I DON’T FUCKING THINK SO.
I’ve been drinking since Erika was using a pacifier. And honestly, when I was using a pacifier I’d crawl over to the liquor cabinet when my parents weren’t looking to dunk it in some Jack.
Finally, I’m pretty sure if Matt showed up at a Twin Cities tweet-up, Julie would try to tuck him in around 8 PM to make sure he got a good night of sleep.
What about BDGarp? Yeah, even we don’t have anyone here that should be institutionalized *but in a good way* like him.
That said, don’t even get me riled up about @sshatmaddie, MrSysex, Jill, JWynia, PuddinBoobs, MrTuttle and others. This collection makes the Brunch Team look like a bunch of amateurs
So give it up with your Sultans of Sausage, your Excellency of Eggs, your Majesty of Mimosas, and your Bombast of Bacon.
As soon as us Twin Cities people get up from our naps, stretch, pay the baby sitter and get our drink on…. We are coming for you.
*Drops Keyboard Walks Off Stage*
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- 13abovethenight said:I need to be a part of this crew.
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- mongrelmess said:Maybe the best Tumblr post of all time.
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- fatnessneverlean said:I would brunch with you any time, anywhere, on a cat or on a chair. I would brunch you on a train. I would brunch inside your brain. (Yes. I’ve been drinking.)
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- lastoneinthepool said:Brilliance.
- changingstephanie said:I love you so much.
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