Sometimes I Don't Mind

So I just booked my room at the Holiday Inn (and have had my flight booked for a while)… So this shit just got real.

I am just a touch excited to meet you folks.

It’s been well over a month since our last edition of 10 Top Tweets, so it’s only fitting that I come back and write about one of my favorite tweeters, @goldengateblond.  Unless you are under a Twitter rock, then you probably have already read the brilliant Lady Gaga/Denny’s Gran Slam tweet—so I am leaving that out.

There are several people on Twitter that make me go “daaaaaaammmmnnn, I wish I’d thought of that.”  She tops that list.  She’s also not afraid to throw her beliefs out there and stand behind them (note, since our politics seem to align, of course I feel more favorably toward her tweets).

If you were only to follow two people on Twitter, GoldenGateBlond should be one of the two.

So please enjoy the ten I selected as my favorites and then go read more on her Favstar Page.


“They just opened the first rehab center for internet addiction. As soon as I find their online class schedule, I’m so signing up.”

“PUNK KID AT THE STORE: It’s only 8pm. Why are you yawning?
ME: Oh I’m still tired from all the partying I did BEFORE YOU WERE EVEN BORN.”

“I’m sitting outside drinking myself into a stupor. I may feel like shit tomorrow but by God, so will the mosquitoes.”

“I think this bra creates a little too much cleavage. Someone just stared at my chest and said, “Nice ass.””

“Charlie Sheen gets bricks of coke delivered but a pharmacist has to unlock a case if I want Sudafed so THE WAR ON DRUGS IS WORKING YOU GUYS.”

“Being unemployed means every day is Saturday. But it’s the one right before payday so you can’t really enjoy it.”

“When people ask how I lost weight, I tell them I did it the old-fashioned way: Speed and cigarettes.”

“Someone stole a port-a-potty from a local music festival.
I can’t believe he got away with that shit.”

“I just spilled an entire bottle of liquid soap. Now I don’t know what to use to clean it up.”

“Canadian citizens have rejected a bid to bring Fox News to their country. And for once, they’re not sorry.”

Six clicks of a button and only four numbers typed in.  That’s all it took to wipe out two-thirds of my remaining student loan debt.  I mean it’s only taken 11-15 years (undergrad in ‘96, grad school in ‘00) to get to this point.

It seems strange, like paying an amount that large should have had confetti fall and balloons float to the ceiling, or at least a hail of trumpets when I clicked submit.  But it didn’t.

Next month my student loan debt will be in the four figure range, which is really exciting when you consider it was greater than 50K when this all started.

I should be able to kick that before the end of the year.

I can’t fathom what it’ll be like for kids graduating school now because many of them will have higher debt than I had—even before they consider heading off to get any type of advanced degree.

I wanted to come home from curling and be in bed an hour ago. Instead I spent that time reading my Tumblr timeline on the old iPod Touch. I really appreciate you idiots.

Even you.

(A) Age: 36
(B) Bed Size: Queen.
(C) Chore You Hate: Mopping.  Can stand it, can’t stand up for it.
(D) Dogs? Not yet, we won’t do that to our cat (she had dog issues with her previous owner). However, Fiona and I are thinking a mutt that’s primarily either Corgi or Bulldog…and we shall name him/her Vincent van Dogh
(E) Essential Start Your Day Item: Coffee and morning breath kiss from my half asleep wife.
(F) Favorite Color: Green
(G) Gold or Silver? Neither - stainless steel.  There’s a story about my wedding ring, but I’ll save that for another time.
(H) Height: 6 foot even. 
(I) Instruments You Play: Nada. No musical skills at all.
(J) Job Title: Dealer Channel Manager
(K) Kids: None
(L) Live: Yes.  Oh, you mean where do I live?  Sunny Saint Paul, Minnesota.
(M) Mom’s Name: Hope
(N) Nicknames: I’ve had many in my life, but none seem to stick. 
(O) Overnight Hospital Stays? Just my tonsils.
(P) Pet Peeve: I hate “I seen it.”  Makes me want to fucking slap the person who said it.
(Q) Quote from a Movie:  “You may run like Hayes, but you hit like shit.”
(R) Right or Left Handed? Mostly right-handed.  I do a bunch of stuff with my left though.
(S) Siblings: None
(T) Time You Wake Up?: Typically between 5:45 and 7 AM depending on the day.  Usually though it’s right at 6 AM.
(U) Underwear: Boxers
(V) Vegetable You Dislike: I HATE pickles with the burning passion of a thousand suns
(W) What Makes You Run Late: Nothing.  If you aren’t 15 minutes early, you are late.
(X) X-Rays You’ve Had Done: Too many to count… Most recently, I broke two ribs during a soccer game two years ago. Three years ago, I also broke my ribs during a soccer game, but I didn’t go to the doctor that time.
(Y) Yummy Food You Make: My specialty is my vegetarian sausage chili.  I also make a mean fajita.
(Z) Zoo, Favorite Animal: Zoos bum me out.  But I do love me some penguins.

Sorry I haven’t been around lately.  Adult recreational sports, school and work have kept me pretty busy.

Anyhow, if you are bored (as usual), I got to blog about beer this week at work.  Specifically, how Surly Brewing Company is using social media to try and get the liquor laws in Minnesota changed so they can serve beer at a new on-premise beer garden.  Anyway, it’s here http://lortondata.com/blog/2011/02/17/patio-season/

Thanks!

I’m fine. I just did something totally dickish to someone by replying to a private message rather than sending them a follow up to their ask box.  It was really bad on my part.

Why Tumblr is a poor tool for communication.  Either way, I’m gonna bury my head in the sand for a little while as I just turned myself into a giant asshole on accident.

…during the Super Bowl, I’ll be hiding in the bathroom on a conference call with @TheJoeBiz and @TerminalSingles coordinating our attacks on the James Harrison and Troy Polamalu voodoo dolls we are each carrying.

If you saw my two tweets earlier today about the dumbass review of El Azteca in Plymouth, MN.  You would know that someone actually wrote a review complaining about the slow service on Cinco de Mayo. Yeah, that’s right, probably their busiest day of the year.

Anyway, I got a big ass beer, asked for a few more minutes to look at the menu, ordered chicken fajita burritos and was served my steaming hot plate of deliciousness all in less than 15 minutes.  Amazing dinner and really inexpensive.  That reviewer can suck it for being stupid.  Also, I really hope everyone else that reads their review thinks they are stupid and petty too.

I’ve taken multiple Myers-Briggs inventories and I typically score an INFJ (this includes last semester when I took it for my Org Behavior grad class).  Occasionally, (like this morning) I will score an ENFJ. I assume this is based on how social I’m feeling at a specific point in time and how the extroverted/introverted indicator questions are being asked - as an only child I go through streaks of being more or less social. 

Either way, here’s the percentage breakdown:

Extroverted 11% - This seems really high for me.

Intuitive 88%

Feeling 12%

Judging 33%